Played by Alyson Hannigan. Way cuter than that Buffy girl. "Nothing in here but back issues of Scientific American. Ooh! I haven't read this one!" "I hate spiders, with their sticky webs and their crawly feet... what do they need all those legs for anyway?"   Willow: "Cibo Matto are playing?" Xander: "No, Willow, they're going to be clog dancing." Willow: "Cibo Matto can clog dance? Oh... sarcasm, right." Willow: "She goes to this skanky bar called the Fish Tank... sometimes they have raids or other stuff that makes you tardy..." Xander: "I'm going to the party." Willow: "What?" Xander: "I gotta' keep an eye on Buffy. Those frat guys creep me." Willow: "You wanna' protect her?" Xander: "Mm-hmm." Willow: "And prove that you're just as good as those rich guys?" Xander: "Mm-hmm." Willow: "Maybe catch an orgy?" Xander: "If it's on early."     "I'll call Xander. What's his number? Oh yeah, 1-800-I'm dating a skanky ho!" Xander: "I don't want to get rough now, Willow!" Willow: "Rough. Rough is good." (as she bites his ear)   CORDELIA Played by Charisma Carpenter. Cordelia is da bomb. Particularly this season, where she has (ah) blossomed. "Eeew! I hate squid!" "That's disgusting. Is that all you think about? (pause) Ok." "What about my pain?"   "You're a sheep.All you ever do is what everyone else does, just so you can say you did it first.And here I am, scrambling for your approval, When I'm way cooler than you are, 'cause I'm not a sheep.I do what I want to do, and I wear what I want to wear, and you know what? I date who I want to date. No matter how lame he is."  "I'm not saying that we should kill a teacher everyday just so I can lose weight, I'm just saying when tragedy strikes, we have to look on the bright side."  "Why doesn't he just slit her throat, or strangle her while she's sleeping, or cut her heart out? What? I'm trying to help." "I think you splashed on just a little too much Obsession for Dorks." Many more Cordelia Quotes are can be found at the House of the Slayer.     "I've seen you fight before, and don't think I can't take you!" "And we can still date. Or not... I mean, I understand if you want to see other fish. I'll do everything I can to make your quality of life better, whether that means little bath toys or whatever." "How 'bout because you're a tiny, impotent Nazi with a bug up his butt the size of an emu." "I wish we could help, you know, without dying."  "Well, I was using the phrase 'watch her back' as a euphemism for looking at her butt. You know, sort of a pun." "Oh, eww! Ohh, you should see this thing. The way it does its thing, I mean, eww! Why do I let you guys drag me into this stuff?" "Hey, if Sunnydale High School shuts down forever, do we automatically graduate?"     MICHELLE   And there's Michelle Yeoh (nee Kwan, aka Khan) who should be on Buffy as the Asian Slayer - though she would make the lamo gung-fu they have on Buffy look pretty sad. You will also note that she has dark hair ... not blonde. Do you see a trend developing here? I think so. Michelle is pretty damned amazing, considering that she can touch the back of her head with the heel of her foot and can (a) act, and (b) do some amazing stunt-fighting. Trivia note - she is the first woman to have her own fight scene in a James Bond movie (in "Tomorrow Never Dies"). Best Michelle Yeoh movies: Wing Chun (all Michelle all the time!) The Heroic Trio (plus Maggie Cheung and Anita Mui) The Executioners (ditto...) Supercop (with that Chan guy) All of the pictures and quotes and stuff on this page relating to Buffy The Vampire Slayer are copyright of Warner Brothers, who pay for the show.